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Being Yourself

Authentically Yourself: You Can Stop "Faking It"
April 13, 2022,
Episode 45

“All of your life you have wanted to be who you are.  That is what authentic means, isn’t it?”

Recognizing you are just “faking it” is a moment of discriminating wisdom that reveals an essential choice point. Will you keep faking it? When the desire for the truth of who you are overwhelms every other human desire, the choice becomes clear. In this exchange, Gangaji takes us on a deep dive into the desire for authenticity and the habit of postponement.

 

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“If you are willing to surrender for a moment any definition of yourself that arises however high or low, you will directly discover what lies underneath.”


Is there a relationship between our self-definitions and the desire to control? What happens when we set aside our definitions, is it freeing or frightening? In this monologue and exchange, Gangaji encourages us to set aside all definitions in a moment of self-inquiry to discover what is free of all definitions—you.

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“Universal, limitless consciousness has no problem with feeling bad or feeling good.” 

When we experience challenging emotions or exacting mental states we may imagine we are “losing our enlightenment.” A day may start with oceanic feelings of bliss, but in the next moment, fear or rage or sadness appear. Are we really losing our enlightenment? What are we overlooking in our quest for the “good feelings?” In this relatable and lively exchange Gangaji imparts the task Papaji gave to her: Find out what doesn’t come and go.
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“Thought is a beautiful power that arises in Awareness. If that power is worshipped or if it is hated, then it grows into a tyranny.  You are Awareness, not the thought of Awareness, but the reality of Awareness.”


When we identify with the thoughts and feelings arising in our mind and body, we overlook our true face—awareness itself. Habitually following thoughts with more thoughts is the root of unnecessary suffering. In this monologue, Gangaji shares how it is possible to effortlessly discover that who you are in reality, is free and unthought.

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“When you’re willing to be still…to stop this forward thrust of accumulation, of a lifestyle, you can give your life, the attention of your life, to discovering what is life.”


When we begin a search for peace or happiness, we may simply be looking for better circumstances, or wanting to feel less lonely, or hoping to release feelings of guilt or sorrow. As we walk that path we may fall into just another lifestyle or we may discover a much deeper truth—the truth of who we are, consciousness itself. How can we honor that discovery, honor our lives as we live each day? What does it mean to live a true life in the wake of recognizing the truth of who one is?

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“Regardless of those people who depend on you, it is possible for you to be true to who you are. Compassionately, ruthlessly true to who you are. . . true to the open heart.”


The most common question Gangaji receives at the end of a retreat is, “How can I trust myself to be true to the truth of who I am while living my daily life?” How do we raise children, pay the bills, go to work, or sustain a marriage and be true to who we are? Is it really a question of trust? In this episode, Gangaji speaks to what is actually closer, and more essential than trust.

“Regardless of those people who depend on you, it is possible for you to be true to who you are....

“Regardless of those people who depend on you, it is possible for you to be true to who you are. Compassionately, ruthlessly true to who you are. . . true to the open heart.”


The most common question Gangaji receives at the end of a retreat is, “How can I trust myself to be true to the truth of who I am while living my daily life?” How do we raise children, pay the bills, go to work, or sustain a marriage and be true to who we are? Is it really a question of trust? In this episode, Gangaji speaks to what is actually closer, and more essential than trust.

“Regardless of those people who depend on you, it is possible for you to be true to who you are....

“The mistake is overlooking what is effortlessly, choicelessly, always here.”


How is it that we actually overlook the truth of ourselves? When we pursue sublime states of mind to attain “unity” on our spiritual path, we can go down a path that instead delivers an experience of separation. Gangaji invites us to simply be, and in that, discover what cannot be “done” and who you truly are.

“The mistake is overlooking what is effortlessly, choicelessly, always here.” How is it that we...
“The secret of freedom is giving up the choice to escape yourself.”

A prison inmate’s letter inspires this month’s podcast. In one of the most loved monologues in the archives, Gangaji speaks of the essential choice to face what has been feared or run from for most of our lives. When we give up any idea of healing and directly experience the woundedness,  we discover a deeper truth—the truth of who we are.

Learn more about the Prison Program.
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At some point in our lives, we will experience a loss of innocence. Whether that disillusionment is with ourselves, our family, or with life itself, there is a choice that arises in the midst of loss. Will we fall into cynicism and self-betrayal? Or will we meet the pain of that loss directly and in that, discover the innocence that was never lost.
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“You are free to discover yourself as Truth. You are free to rest in that Truth. You are free to be happy, regardless of your body, your thoughts, emotions, or circumstances.”

In this month’s podcast, Gangaji begins with a clear exposition on how it is absolutely possible to discover yourself as Truth, no matter your past history. Then in the lively exchange that follows, she speaks to how we deny the truth of ourselves and instead, cling to an identify rooted in our thoughts, emotions, and relative circumstances. Do you dare give up your self-denial?
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“There is no problem with pain. There is pain. If you are seeking something to avoid pain, that’s the suffering. That’s the search that must be called off.”

It takes effort to avoid our emotional pain. We can try to avoid it, but ultimately the common strategies of withdrawing, protecting, and dissociating from feelings of hurt actually turn emotional pain into unnecessary suffering. This lively exchange taken from the Gangaji archives offers a clear demonstration of how we can recognize the strategies we use and then choose to give up the power to suffer.
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“If you stop thinking about how to get out of the body that may be painful or how to keep the body that is pain free, you get to experience the truth.”

Physical pain is an essential aspect of life that serves the survival and well-being of the body, but we can easily turn that necessary pain that alerts us to injury and illness into unnecessary suffering. What is the difference between pain and suffering? What can physical pain reveal to us when we meet it directly?
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How many times, in the name of being liked, have we withheld what we really wanted to say? How many times have we betrayed ourselves so we wouldn't be rejected or judged? Being “nice” potentially blocks us from intimacy with the people closest to us, not to mention ourselves. And what about the parts of us we just plain don't want anyone else to see? Our question this month is, what are the possibilities if we dare to let go of the strategy of being nice?
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It goes without saying that great value can be found in therapy and other forms of self-inspection. There is huge relief in facing our dark sides, healing our deeper wounds and finally feeling emotions we have been running from. But is there a way that we can work on ourselves and still miss the deeper freedom that we are actually in search of? Our conversation this month is, where does therapy end and and self-realization begin?
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Going back through human history, there have been individuals who have had profound spiritual awakenings. As a result, they seem to possess a deeper understanding of what we might call God or stillness or presence. They are sometimes called “enlightened beings”. They stand before us as proof that we too can connect to this essential part of ourselves. For more than twenty years, Gangaji has said she's just like us, but how do our beliefs that she is different, that she has something we don't have, keep us from the exact thing that we are searching for?
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Some people might experience it as insecurity and for others it might feel like outright self-hatred. The desire to protect ourselves from this feeling of unworthiness shows up in different ways. There are those who try to outrun it by building themselves up in the hope that no one will see their flaws, while others tear themselves down as proof of this not-enoughness. Either can be seen as an avoidance of actually experiencing the core of what we perhaps fear ourselves to be. What would a happen if we gave up on trying to be "enough"?
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