Board of Directors: What will happen if we run out of money? . . . . . "

            Gangaji: "We run out of money."

Bill Ek's spiritual journey started over 70 years ago at the age of seven. In 1991, at 41, he met Gangaji for the first time. There were 6 people in the room. With the formation of the Gangaji Foundation in 1993, Bill was invited to be on the Board of Directors to head up the finance committee. This is his story of the early trials (including running out of money), tears, and joy as the young Gangaji Foundation took flight,

The Search

I grew up in a stable suburban home and family west of Chicago, Illinois. Since the 4th grade, I have been seeking answers to questions like: Why are we here? Who are we? Who am I? How does this whole universe-thing fit together? Who is in charge? I couldn't find any answers that made any sense.

My parents started exposing me to the many organized religions by encouraging me to attend "church" with my friends. What I discovered was that all the religions were pretty much the same "at the core" and all believed in some kind of higher power. They all used different words, rituals, and practices, but in the end, I found them all unfulfilling.

Into young adulthood. In my 30s, I was very frustrated. I didn't want to be told how to think and believe, particularly from ancient interpretations from tablets and books. I became empty and, in that emptiness, I began to explore and seek out my answer, but I didn't know where to look.

Quite by accident, on a business trip in Tampa, Florida, I made an appointment with a massage therapist, Eileen Galagher, at her place of business. The environment of her office was reverent and spiritual. There was something very different about her as she ended the session with an unsolicited but energy-matching hug. Then, she gave me a look that forced me to look directly into her eyes and hold it. I was exhilarated. It felt like I was looking into the depths of her soul. It was transformative.

Awakening

Subsequently, Eileen moved her practice to Maui, Hawaii. I vacationed there and scheduled a session. She sent me deeper and deeper into a state of rest and meditation. When it was over, I sat up and looked into her eyes and melted into a state of total bliss and love. I started crying. I felt "Home," finally.

I literally staggered around for two days in a dreamlike euphoria. It felt like a velvet cloak of Universal Love. Not traditional love - but the love of home I had been seeking all my life. I didn't know it at the time, but Eileen was my forever Teacher.

Meeting Gangaji

Eileen said, "I have some friends I'd like you to meet. They live on a small garden farm up in Kula, Maui. Their names are Eli and Toni." They were a very pleasant couple, and I felt there was just something different and very special about them. Eileen said they were about to have a meeting called a Satsang. We all sat on the floor in the living room. Toni, I later found out, went by the name "Gangaji" and sat cross-legged on an elevated platform at the end of the room. There were a total of 6 people.

The next week, I moved out of my resort hotel and into a tent on the farm, working in the garden, planting rose bushes (hopefully - still there today), working with other tent-dwelling visitors. To me, it was simplicity. I remember one of the sweetest meals I have ever had was sitting with Gangaji, Eli, and Eileen, and eating one sweet potato.

I climbed naked in the trees and picked breadfruit with another male visitor. We swam with the group naked on the beach. Eileen was pregnant with her daughter, Leela, at the time. What an experience, walking on a beach with a naked pregnant woman. I was in a complete state of bliss. I never wanted it to end.

In Pain

But I was terrified. I couldn't bear returning to my executive job and big fancy Chicago office with my secretary pushing my schedule at me every morning. Noise, speed, obligations, bright lights, and a daily life that was not my own.

The worst part—there were no Gangaji communities in the U.S. Everyone I knew and loved in my new state of awareness lived on Maui! I even looked for work on Maui, but the highest-paid sugar mill CEO made half of what I was earning in Chicago.

I needed big money to pay bills, so I returned to Chicago. I was depressed, sad, lonely, and wanted so desperately to return to Maui. If not, I wanted to die. Hawaii and Eileen and Gangaji were home, my spiritual core. So, what was I going to do?

I was lost and deeply unhappy. I was at my lowest ebb, circling the drain, ready to cash it in and then…

The Call to Serve

…I received word from Gangaji inviting me to join a Board that would manage a new entity called The Gangaji Foundation! It would start in Maui, and eventually was to be based in Boulder, Colorado. I was bouncing off the walls with joy! I was being called to serve! By Gangaji! Wow! Furthermore, my first assignment was to head the Finance Committee. Well, my old ego kicked right in. Having a high-powered job as the Global Financial Systems Director for McDonald's Restaurants (Corporation) in Chicago would qualify me to take on the new role.

The Challenge

But wait, there was a problem! Sales, Marketing, Accounts Receivable, Chart of Accounts, General Ledger, Financial Reporting. None of this felt right for The Gangaji Foundation. We could not possibly mix traditional accounting with the beauty, purity, and simplicity of the lineage passed on by Ramana and Papaji. We needed something different. Something new!

The good news was that Gangaji was becoming well known and more in demand from people wanting to sit with her. Not just Satsangs on Maui, but major cities in the United States and even Europe. The availability of books, audios, and VHS tapes from the early Satsangs fueled the fire.

But the global interest started to cause some financial problems. Satsang in remote cities meant air fares for Eli and Gangaji and their travel associates. Housing was needed, hotels had to be booked, and halls had to be rented. The bills were piling up. What were we going to do? Book and audio sales were insufficient. Bank accounts were running out. Credit cards were being maxed out. We even needed to spend more on infrastructure. Equipment, tables, and furniture had to be bought to keep up with demands from the cities and recording needs, as well as office infrastructure.

I called together the new finance committee (consisting of board members) and we looked at the challenges. We met for what seemed like days trying to brainstorm some solutions. Things like asking for (optional) money at the door of Satsang, calling them donations; suggesting an amount; sending out donation requests; and even calling key people with money and considering the forbidden word "fundraising." It all seemed wrong!

Stuck

The Finance Committee was completely stuck. I was a complete failure, back circling the drain. I lost many nights’ sleep, ashamed to approach Gangaji. I knew she was waiting for a solution, patient in letting us do our job. But we had to tell ourselves the truth and face the situation. We had to send a note to Gangaji telling her we were rapidly running out of money with no solution.

So, we did just that. During our next face-to-face meetings, we wrote a simple one-line note with a question to her:

            "Gangaji - we are out of money and have no solution to solve the problem.

            What will happen if we run out of money?"

We sat for a couple of hours waiting for her response. In the early afternoon, a return note arrived. We opened it up with anxious anticipation. In her reply, she repeated our question:

            Board: What will happen if we run out of money? . . . . . "

            Gangaji: "We run out of money."

Wham! Wow! That was a turning point. Stop the worry. Stop pushing.

The Miracle Take Off

Without explanation, a number of things started to happen. We really didn't do anything. Costs were reduced immediately as more remote communities found housing and food when Gangaji traveled; people donated airfares; equipment was found and loaned; hundreds of volunteer hours were expended to hold events; cash donations started to come in by word of mouth. People realized buying books and tapes was a form of helping out. The monthly donor program started almost without effort. Checks started to arrive. The Finance Committee coined the phrase "funds-arising." All we had to do was catch what was showing (floating) up.

Gangaji helped with guidance in maintaining integrity and purity by approaching Papaji to ask him about accepting donations at Satsang and sending out donor letters. His response was, "Of course, you can reveal you have financial needs, but always ask, don’t beg."

Soaring

Staying aloft and flying steady was not all smooth, but we were ecstatic that we were going to continue to survive as an entity and still maintain the purity of the lineage. Joy returned to the Board. We were soaring! Without trying, pushing, evangelizing, strategizing, or doing anything, the non-organization grew by community "pull" and not "push."I stayed on with the board and the finance role for about 3 years and then passed the baton. I am so grateful for all the wonderfully dedicated administrative people over the years who continued to refine and grow the Foundation to what it is today. To me - looking back - it is unimaginable. The growth continues to be a true miracle of love and beauty.

Postscript

In 1998, my wife Colette and I bought a home in Ashland, Oregon, while still living in the San Francisco Bay Area. It is ironic that around 2004, Gangaji and Eli, and the Foundation moved to Ashland too. I am now in touch with Gangaji, live near Ashland, and attend some local retreats. Besides meeting new friends, I also see some of my friends from the old board in Maui.

All One Love - Bill